Holding onto an Offense

How do I know if I am holding onto an offense ?

The Blame Test
Do I blame everybody else for my anger and bitterness? “It’s because of what THEY did, HE did, SHE did.” This is an indication that I have been offended and I can’t let go. I say, “It would be so much better if that person was out of my life.” Blame is an indication of an offense you need to let go.

The Bitterness Test
Have I been keeping score? There’s a mental check list in my mind, and every time a person does something, I say, “You OWE me!” I may have had a person that made a major mistake in the past, and I am STILL holding it over their head. No matter how good they are to me, I keep saying in my own mind, “You OWE me!” I can’t forgive the offense. With this attitude, I am killing my relationship with them. And it’s because I can’t let go of the offense. If I want to save my relationships, I better let go and not bring it up again.

The Behavior Test
Do I ever find myself reacting to someone, not because of what they have done, but because they remind me of someone else? Do I remember something that my parents did to me as a child, and when someone seems to act the same way, I blow up? I get upset? I can rehearse it, and try to figure out ways to get even. Or I can release it, and experience God’s grace and forgiveness.

Everyone is going to be hurt in life. How I respond to that hurt is going to determine my level of happiness. For my own peace of mind, I need to let go of the hurt. Resentment doesn’t hurt the other person. It only hurts me. I am the one who is stewing, while others are going on with their lives.

I may say, “They’ve hurt me too much. I just can’t forgive them.” I’m right! I can’t! It’s only through the power of God in my life that I can forgive.

Christmas is the right time to repair relationships.

Parking Lots and Sales

I recently heard someone say that they were pulling into a parking lot, and the space closest to the building opened up. They said it was a sign that God was with them.

And then two weeks ago I heard about two people who were sick and one of them was healed. And they were talking enthusiastically about how God had intervened to heal the one person.

And the whole time, I’m thinking, “What about the other person? They didn’t get healed. Where was God? Why didn’t God intervene for them ?

And just last night I heard someone say that they had been in a store and saw something that they really wanted and it was on sale. And they said, “This just shows how good God really is!”

If God can help people find things on sale, why doesn’t he spend more time doing something about things more important - like earthquakes, or famines, or sickness?

When you think of God, or when you hear about God, what image comes to mind? An old man with a long white beard, who is behind the curtain, working all the levers? He’s healing some. And he’s finding parking places for others?..– Rob Bell